creds to Mac Miller’s “Floating”

I didn’t grow up in such comfortable opportunities to really utter what was actually going on in my head — yet I found writing is my ultimate escape from the reality that I wasn’t such a good storyteller. I was almost never believed any people ever since I could remember, built very brick and thick walls through the times. Not until these tough days we’re all having nowadays which slowly peeled off my vulnerability. …


a photo i took on my neighborhood :)

I wrote this down exactly a year ago and never got a chance to publish this tousled writing — as I know I wasn’t in a very great state of life, went on such hardships I must slowly learn and bear last year. Life is always full of lemons, but it’s not always lemons.

I’ve grown a lot, my soul and spirituality have developed a lot throughout the year, I’ve learned about myself a lot especially during our global pandemic times. But it doesn’t mean it gets easier day by day; in fact, it was the opposite. As you grow…


This might be one of very personal writing for me since I haven’t truly emphasized my own definition of being a woman myself, not until I progressively realized my need to interpret it on this twenty-five years old human being. I’ve always been so curious about the term “Gender” since I was learning about Woman Politics at my Degree back then in 2015. The term gender has specifically got me interested because turns out it has nothing to do with what we called “Sex” that we always correlate with our gender identity.

I was born as a woman, and I…


It only took me few days after I bought this book and finished it immediately as I really fell in love at the first sight I saw the book. It’s Not About The Burqa basically telling you various stories about Muslim Women in the West especially in this present era that consists of different kinds of stories about their representations, choices, appearances, sexuality, and their identities as Muslim Women.

As a minority that lives in a country dominated by Muslims, I didn’t expect that Muslims also have the same struggles where they’re living in places of which they are in…


It’s basically telling you how to be the ethical slut. Literally.

Reading this book over the weeks made me realize one thing; there is no such thing as a defined “perfect” human relationship because it’s basically a different case for everyone. In the beginning, the authors said that this book is going to tell us a lot of different and queer cases of human relationships, partnerships, or whatever you may be called it––so then you can define whatever best works for you and your partner/s. Or perhaps if you ever want to do it alone, it’s all our choices.

This book definitely permeates gender-neutral as the key to make any relationships…


Source from Pinterest

I never truly conceived the notion of some particles that exist in humanness because I’ve always viewed life in very big and general pictures; rather than tried to give myself a chance to look, learn, figure, seek, and fathom in deeper ways. It’s like the universe sent us messages every second in our life, but perhaps we denied it insistently. However, time always comes in a very precise manner, which makes us speechless frequently.

The universe works in a very mysterious and remarkable way.

I’ve always viewed life as a very bizarre, scary, and perplexing place to breathe; since the…


Are we dying from the virus or from being unable to survive poverty?
Are we dying from the virus or from being unable to survive poverty?
Source from Pinterest

Women, undoubtedly, are facing such a huge amount of disaster through this pandemic. I literally read so many different kinds of articles that said similar things that women are facing the double-trouble on this pandemic, even right when it started. The title that came up like–Women are more affected by the austerity of COVID-19 physically and mentally–and such else like that just too often has been written all over the media publications. Leaving for such a small example that in pre-pandemic, we were also carried the way that we have to show up at our work or some important meetings…


A photo I took at my rooftop :)

Picking from some of the spiritualists I’ve learned and watched, that a healing process is a lifetime process. And, what I did believe that I wasn’t able to be truly transformed if I‘m not healed completely. While signing up myself in a lot of overthinking and over-analyzing something that I couldn’t control, I forgot how to actually breathe. I forgot how to live properly.


Source by Pinterest

I need to grasp myself to get into this writing idea since I have so many medium drafts saved but never gain my confidence to publish them, so. I love to have a talk about so many different kinds of stuff, but this time I just want to get into one thing called Love. And how I define it nowadays with my spiritual journey throughout the recent times of my self-reflection.

I do have so many things to be discussed when it comes to the way I create a conversation about love, affection, and compassion. I let myself drown into…


Veronica Acuna via pinterest

It feels like some people are misinterpret when someone is being “feminist” or speaking him / her voice for women’s right. They took the basic assumption of feminism, that is the antagonism or inversion of control to men, whereas the fact, you missed all the significant points of, why women raising their voices?

Have you ever been in a threat? Living under your own roof, relatively speaking, you were already a grown up person who can maintain your needs. But the there is always some uncertain threats, fears, arise in your illogical mind, as if they are dwell inside you…

Vanesha Febrilly

she/they - political science graduate. currently studying gender studies // some of my personal interests in politics, gender, feminism, & spirituality.

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